"Intimacy is a four syllable word for, "Here's my heart and soul, please grind them into hamburger, and enjoy." It's both desired, and feared. Difficult to live with, and impossible to live without. Intimacy also comes attached to the three R's... relatives, romance, and roommates. There are some things you can't escape. And other things you just don't want to know. "
-- Greys Anatomy
Holding on, Its something that I myself need to learn to let go. Relationships at this age many have said to me, Is it really worth all of the struggle. And through the heartbreak, hurt words, and misinterrupted feelings, I would still say Yes. Because even though at this moment, every inch of me aches. Not from physical impact, but from the words crushing and breaking every bone.
I would choose to go through it all to have that good.
Because in love, we make sacrafises. And I am sacrafising myself, my well being, every inch of sanity. All for love and affection, to have you caress my skin, kiss my forehead, held in your arms away from the world, away from its demons.
Tell me it's going to be okay. I won't ever need to be afraid again, we wont be back at this fork in the road between right and wrong.
Right can so easily lead to worse, and wrong can even more easily become unbearable.
I would choose to make it right. Because even though I know, it will end up
leading nowhere
but a dead end.
Id rather feel something than nothing at all.
I will love you, because even though its hurting me to care.
And breaking my heart to know that road from right to wrong its so close to my
finger tips but so uncontrollable, I will still always choose.
To love you.
Because Id rather feel something than nothing at all.
----
Im not breaking my promise, Im holding you to it not to break yours.
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funny how things change, and other things will always stay the same.
Wrote November 24th 2009
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